Knowledge

Here is what I know.

I know that God is the same today as He was yesterday and will be tomorrow.

I know my husband loves me.

I know I am a good mother.

I know I am passionate with my desires.

I know I am less confident today than I have ever been.

I know that with more knowledge comes realization that I am not in control.

I know I cry a lot, and when I do, sometimes I don't know why I'm crying.

I know that I have not forgotten their trespasses against me.

I know that I panic.

I know that my organization is to hide my imperfection.

I know that I am not alone.

I know that I am bitter.

I know that when I am safe, I am happy.

I know that safety is hard to come across.

I know that I do not like to be alone with my thoughts.

I know that I dream about my victimization all the time.

I know I doubt myself too much.

I know I do not trust anyone 100%.

I know that includes God.

I know that I question our duty here on earth.

I know my daughter resents me for the boundaries I set for her.

I know that she is five and it will only get harder with time.

I know I want her to look at me the same as she did when she thought I was perfect.

I know I am nervous that my husband's touch will feel different after being gone so long.

I know that my tension will ease up when I am holding him in my arms again.

I know that I secretly don't want to put my children to bed at night, I just want to hold them forever.

I know that I am an excellent wife.

I know that I can not sleep with my heart pounding like this.

I know that I'm afraid of it all falling apart one day.

I know that I would crumble right along with it.

I know that God would put me back together...I know that....and I've never known that until now.

"Go down to the potter's house, and there I will give you my message" So I went down to the potter's house, and I saw him working at the wheel. But the pot he was shaping from the clay was marred in his hands; so the potter formed it into another pot, shaping it as seemed best to him...Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in my hand...Jeremiah 18:2-6

Tabetha